Diary of The Captive
by Hypermon
Summary: The terrifying truth behind what goes on in the life of Ash's Pikachu. Its pretty funny. REVIEW PLEASE!


I don't own pokemon.........

DIARY OF THE CAPTIVE: PIKACHU

DAY 824:

For fear of boredom, I have decided to keep a small diary. My captor, the rather idiotic young male with a piece of red and white fabric on his head, has been harassing me more than usual today. In the morning, he found it amusing to dangle bizarre objects in front of my face. Then he stole my apple and uttered "No breakfast till we're done training" Whatever THAT meant.

After he threw my breakfast away, he continued yelling at me for a longer time. Eventually, I shocked him as I was at the end of my respect for his presence. When he fell, the red-haired, loud female screamed at me as well in her human language. In response, I recoiled away, just wanting to end the subject. Later, I must devise a plan to escape. But for now, I suppose I'll eat another dandelion plant.

DAY 825:

I have slept most of the day. Right before that, there was some sort of gathering of the three humans I am forced to live with. From afar, I was watching their activities and I have learned about their game which involves many pieces of paper. The humans each pass around the small papers to each other and sometimes form neat piles of the papers in front of them. It seems they call these papers "playing cards." It seems a waste to me though.

DAY 826:

Yesterday night, I had the privilege of stealing my captor's talking pocketmachine. It is the only friend I have in this horrible life. At night I was pushing some of its buttons and it showed me some interesting pictures of caterpie's evolutions. We had a lovely conversation about Butterfree as well. Unfortunately, my captor has found me with his pocketmachine and grabbed it away suddenly. I shocked him very forcefully, to show him what damage I was capable of doing and perhaps strike fear in his heart but he just sizzled a bit and gave me the well known look of "I'm so disappointed Pikachu..."

DAY 827:

We have reached a big village today. My captor has yet again taken me to one of those buildings with the pink-haired women and the Chanseys again. The whole point of this place is shrouded in mystery. Every time I come here, the same pink-haired women takes me into a white room and studies my body. I have noticed however, that if I have a scratch or something other, the women make it disappear. I think next time I must go through this activity, I shall try to figure out the meaning of it.

DAY 828:

Today, I attempted to kill my captor by weaving around his feet while he was walking. And it almost worked too. I must try this at the edge of a cliff one day.

DAY 829:

We are still in the same village. I was left with the red-haired female's togepi today. The three humans went into a different building and left me outside, with the togepi. On top of the building's entrance hole the symbols "restaurant' are printed. I'm not even going to bother trying to figure out the meaning of this.

As for now, the togepi is by my side, sleeping. Lately, I have been trying to teach it some forceful attacks. It has been able to learn metronome, yet cannot control this attack and use it effectively. But the three humans STILL have not congratulated me for training the little pokemon. i believe I deserve a good meal for my efforts.

Although, it has saddened me that togepi is still to young to learn how to use handguns and grenades. That must be our next lesson.

DAY 830:

My captor and his counterparts were in another quarrel with those two other humans with the talking Meowth. The Meowth has mastered the human's frightful tongue and speaks it regularly. He seems to be an informant to the humans. I'm sure he reports and translates everything I say. But since his master's always run away and re-appear, its hard for me to get a hold of him. But its only a matter of time.

Well, besides that, every time I get in contact with these other two humans known as "Team Rocket" they always try to take me away from my captor. I always let them take me, for it seems they value my presence in high regard. Although, every time, my captor of one of his accomplices manages to steal me back. Its a very strange activity, I'm not sure what the daily meaning of this fight for me is. I should ask the Meowth. He seems to understand this human world better than I. But I have so many questions to ask of him, I fear he may get annoyed by me...

DAY 831:

We have walked out of the village and into a polluted forest. I am sitting on my captor's shoulder; he is holding the pocketmachine in his hands, ready for use. Suddenly, he stops and points the pocketmachine at a Sentret. The pocketmachine tells my idiot captor that the creature is indeed a Sentret and some interesting facts about its habits.

The red-haired, loud girl comments crudely about the Sentret and we move along.

My boredom is overwhelming. I'm not sure whether to cry of to tear apart my captors and escape into the forest, never to be seen again. Although, I don't think THIS forest would be good to run away into; its overly polluted.

DAY 832:

It is exactly noon at the moment. The three humans have agreed to staying in this small opening in the woods. In futile attempts, they begin to set up camp. Currently, all of them are working on hatching up this large thin, tan colored piece of fabric called a "tent."

Togepi, is yet again by my side. The little creature is a good listener and I think if we started heavy weapons training at this early age, togepi would grow to become most powerful. I feel as if he is my son, the one I never had and probably never will have due to my recent neutering.

DAY 833:

I am now finally aware of what evil sadistic minds my captors have. For no good reason, I was chosen for the water torture. This time however, I was forced to be dunked in the polluted waters of the river and also had a burning, foamy chemical called "shampoo" used on me. What sick minds could invent such a liquid?

DAY 834:

I'm tired of this stupid forest. We've been here for 3 days now and the foul odor of the forest is getting to me.

last night, I went on a walk around the woods alone. I had a small conversation with the HootHoot, but they're erratic happiness was worrying me. The HootHoot have said they'd seen me with my captor here before and think he is very nice to me. Shows what they know.

DAY 835: 

I think after this entry, my small diary will be filled up. I know not how to end this in a high way, so I suppose I'll just describe my captor and his accomplices fully:

ASH: It seems my main captor calls himself by that name. He is a young male child with very little common sense and bad grooming habits. He never changes his "underpants" as I learned to call them and in turn, when he visits his mother human, she seems to be annoyed by that.

He enjoys using my friend, the pocketmachine and sucking up wild pokemon into those horrifying red-and-white spheres. Overall, I'd say my captor never learns from his many mistakes and will NEVER please me by his actions.

MISTY: This is my captor's female. I believe she finds pleasure in his presence.

Most of the time this human is loud, rude, and enjoys pulling the tall no-eyed male's ears when he discovers a different insignificant female. This must be some sort of jealousy ritual she often performs. She is not a human of my likings.

BROCK: The tall no-eyed male. He is a pretty bad cook, but I am able to survive on his brown food pellets and dry cereal. He is very clean and enjoys giving me fur-brushings. 

I cannot find anything particularly annoying about this human, yet I watch my back when he nears me. I'm not sure whether to classify him as friend or foe.

I suppose this is the end of my tiny diary. Perhaps in the future, I'll get a better understanding of these mysterious humans that keep me with them. I can't figure out the meaning of wandering around the world senselessly like we have been doing for only too long. In short, farewell, I must depart to go to the bathroom in that bush...

HYPERMON: If you value your life, then REVIEW. If not, then don't and I'll come for you later.


End file.
